Thursday, September 17, 2009

FALLING INTO FALL...at breakneck speed

Shwoop dee woop!
Off I go!
My time of slow
Less
Step by step
Have been swallowed up by choice to do and go and learn...
Time has speed up again, taken off and is
Flying....
Soaring...
Going...going...going...gone...

Finding Balance
Again I struggle with learning and re-learning
The same lessons over over over over again
Less is more
But
I still want to do yoga, study German, hang out at the play ground with the kids, teach drama, build lego houses, teach yoga, cook delicious dinners, read an inspiring book, keep the house clean and cozy, watch German classic flicks with my husband, go out and explore Berlin, keep up contact with my friends in all the places I have been, keep up contact and see my friends here, sit still, water the plants, paint the pictures I have been meaning to for the last 4 years, update the photo albums, walk in the woods and watch the leaves turn red and swirl down, and, and, and...

Isn't there so much we all want to do...
To accomplish...
To keep up...

At times I feel whole and grounded
Ready to hibernate and regenerate
At times I feel scattered
Like the autumn leaves
Swirling around in the cool wind
here
there
up
down
back and forth
around and around
in a chaotic ballet of falling beauty
What happens in this rush of wanting to do and go...
I step too far
I catch a cold
My body takes over and yells
LESS IS MORE dammit!
So I am forced to
Or rather I finally allow myself the chance to
Snuggle up in bed with a hot cup of tea and something to read
I laugh at myself
I shake my head at myself and smile
I am who I am...
I've still so much to learn
But I cant learn it all at once...
As the kids would say,
"Silly mama."

Peace and laughter,
erinbell



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